haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
