dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
