hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
