Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
