I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize