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• (503): View more from Oregon

  ...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.

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• 

  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.

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