Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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