found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I would fuck him just for his dog
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
