No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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