VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
