just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
