Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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