The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
His hands were made for my vagina.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Randomize
