You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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