im about as happy as oj after his trial
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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