Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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