Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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