i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Randomize