Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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