I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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