At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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