I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
