Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
