so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
