So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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