if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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