I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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