Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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