So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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