White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
