You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
She announced her abortion via fbk
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
