I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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