Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
