so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize