Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
