she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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