So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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