Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
