Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
