But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
