Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
