The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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