This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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