There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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