the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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