Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
