Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
