lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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