Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
