just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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