i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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